Whipped Cream Difficulties

In this case, not the timeless changeless ways of the Amish, but those of the…Emerald Triangle pot growers, who find their way of life threatened. Not by the fact that what they do is, you know, friggin’ illegal, but

Battered by competition from indoor cultivators around the state and industrial-size operations that have invaded the North Coast counties, many of the small-time pot farmers who created the Emerald Triangle fear that their way of life of the last 40 years is coming to an end.

Yes. They’re being threatened by competition.

Since the mid-1990s, the price of outdoor-grown marijuana has plummeted from more than $5,000 a pound to less than $2,000, and even as low as $800.

More:

…the liberalization of marijuana laws in the last decade upended the status quo.
From Oakland to the Inland Empire, people began cultivating indoors on an unprecedented scale at the same time that growers from around the world flooded the North Coast because of its remoteness and deep-rooted counterculture.

Medical marijuana dispensaries, according to the LAT, prefer weed grown indoors; I’m no expert on growing dope, but I’d figure that growing indoors gives you a more consistent product and more reliable sourcing.

The locals complain that back in the old days (we’re talking about the 1980s here), dope farmers “paid for community centers, fire departments, road maintenance and elementary schools.”

Even today, small cannabis-funded volunteer fire stations and primary schools are scattered throughout the ranges. And the local radio station, KMUD, announces the sheriff’s deputies’ movements as part of its public service mandate.

But now:

Longtime residents complain that the newcomers cut down trees, grade hillsides, divert creeks to irrigate multi-thousand-plant crops, use heavy pesticides and rat poisons, and run giant, smog-belching diesel generators to illuminate indoor grows. They blaze around in Dodge monster trucks and Cadillac Escalades and don’t contribute to upkeep of the roads or schools.

And:

“Ultimately we worry about Winston or Marlboro getting some land and doing their thing,” said Lawrence Ringo, a 55-year-old grower and seed breeder deep in the wilds of Sohum. “We see it time after time in America — big corporations come in and take over.”

Wow, Ringo. Did you really think that when dope was legalized, R.J. Reynolds was going to come down out of the hills and start purchasing your organic free-range ganja in quantities large enough to satisfy the American consumer?

“How can sun-grown not be better medicine?” Anna asked. “If you’re sick, you want something that has chemicals in it? You can’t grow indoor organically. Not to mention the fossil fuels it burns up.”

“If you’re sick, you want something that has chemicals in it?” Yes, you stupid bitch. We in the civilized world call that “medicine”. And here’s another big fucking hint for you: everything has chemicals in it, including your organic brown rice and that dope you’re growing.

The libertarian side of me believes that marijuana should be legalized. The non-liberatarian side of me is starting to lean more towards legalization, if it means that these idiots will be forced to find some sort of useful work.

Legalization “has the potential to be devastating,” she said.

The most shocking thing about this story? That the LAT apparently printed it with a straight face.

This entry was posted on Monday, October 1st, 2012 at 8:25 pm and is filed under California Über Alles, Clippings, Law. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.