Instead of a clever introduction to this week’s TMQ, I’m going to give you, my loyal readers, a fitting present for the holiday season. After the jump…
No, no, no need to thank me. Just part of the service we provide here at WCD. We’re a giving bunch here.
And with that out of the way, let’s jump into TMQ’s Christmas column.
We are sorry to say that Gregg Easterbrook apparently finds the “wish list for each NFL team” more amusing than we do. Frankly, we don’t even understand the Baltimore one. We will confess to a slight chuckle at the Washington one, though.
“Stat of the Week No. 8: The Lions won on the road for the first time since Oct. 28, 2007.” Noted here, because you know how much WCD loves the Lions.
Pam just sort of has that empty blond look to her. Now the three cheerleaders right below her dressed in Santa garb, especially #1: hubba hubba!
“As for the Giants’ coaching: Has any coaching staff ever had a worse quarter?” Gee, Gregg, I don’t know? Possibly the 1993 Oilers coaching staff when they played Buffalo? The one where Buffalo came back from being down 35-3? The game you mentioned two paragraphs previously?
“The disgusting low was that the coaches screwed up and then the head coach publicly shifted blame to the team’s lowest-status member, rather than take responsibility, like a man.” This is one where WCD is firmly on TMQ’s side. Coughlin wouldn’t know leadership if it walked into a bar and shot Greedo first. “Praise in public, criticize in private.”
Sweet: New England protects the football. Sour: Pittsburgh and Denver safeties, New England – Green Bay, San Diego – San Francisco. (“The 49ers remain alive to win the division and play host to a home playoff game at 7-9, while a 10-6 team would miss the postseason. Don’t get me started.” Oh, please, Gregg, get started. Here, let me give you a shot of ether.) Sweet and sour: Baltimore – New Orleans.
More creep. Maybe, Gregg, it’s called “Leinenkugel’s Spring” because it’s intended to invoke feelings and memories of spring during the cold winter months? Also, Gregg, maybe the reason that people are announcing presidential debates now is so that potential candidates can schedule around them?
“In the crazed Texas system, 128 large public high schools make the playoffs in two divisions”. That’s a funny stat, Gregg, but Texas is the second most populous state in the union. How does the Texas playoff system compare to the California one, for example? What are the relative levels of high school football participation in California, Texas, and other populous states?
WCD would have liked to see TMQ discuss the safety issues around the Minnesota – Chicago contest in more detail. Does TMQ agree with the people who suggest it was somewhat hypocritical for a league ostensibly concerned with safety to play a game on a frozen field in a blinding snowstorm?
Offensive linemen go wild and unnoticed! Sometimes all you need to do is run it up the middle! Fortune favors the bold! Concussion stuff!
Redskins bashing. We just can’t get enough. (Is that a young Lady GaGa as one of the backup dancers?)
Gregg Easterbrook also thinks his holiday letter parody is much more amusing than we do.
TMQ thinks a Christmas countdown clock would be useful. WCD would prefer a flamingo lawn ornament painted olive-drab with “FRONT TOWARD ENEMY” stenciled on it. We do agree with Easterbrook that A Call to Men looks like an organization that deserves support.
Who’s worse: WikiLeaks, or the White House/Pentagon axis? The stuff that WikiLeaks released happened in the past, while the White House is tipping off al-Qaeda and the Taliban that we’re planning further attacks in Pakistan.
Someone other than WCD apparently questioned Easterbrook’s assertion that “Favre’s 297-game streak will never be broken”, offering Peyton Manning (206 and counting) as a possibility. “Yet to break Favre’s record, Manning will need to start every game until Halloween 2016, which just doesn’t seem probable even for someone with demonstrated longevity.” WCD is no fan of the Manning clan (except for Archie; Archie’s okay) but we are willing to bet TMQ $5 that Peyton Manning breaks Favre’s record. If WCD and TMQ can agree on someone to hold the bet in escrow until Halloween 2016, WCD will put our $5 up now.
“That’s some team chemistry you have there, Texans.” Yes, it is. And the fish rots from the head down.
Oh, how nice. Kubiak “plans” to win the last two games. I guess this is as opposed to his usual plan to lose every game he plays. Meanwhile, I plan to have cheerleader #1 bathed and escorted to my bunk.
Tebow! “NFL teams might invest $20 million to $50 million in the starting quarterback — you don’t want a $50 million investment going off tackle.” WCD wishes TMQ would go into more detail about this: $20 to $50 million over what time frame? Is investing that much money in a quarterback a good idea? Should Cam Newton be quarterbacking in the NFL after only 14 college starts? (JaMarcus Russell had 25.)
We’re really not clear what point TMQ is trying to make, other than his obsession with undrafted unknown players (and some Singletary bashing) in his San Diego – San Francisco item. Nor are we sure we agree with TMQ’s “take the penalty on the try for go for two” logic in the Miami – Buffalo discussion; is there really that much difference between a two-point try from the 2-yard line vs. one from the 1-yard line? Really?
TMQ makes a similar point to the one we were making about Ralph Friedgen: does a 74-50 record and seven bowls in 10 years justify firing the guy? Apparently so, if you can get Mike Leach.
Ha ha! Various people had to cancel their various winter celebrations because of winter weather! How is this even noteworthy?
“Temperature is a mathematical concept, neither warm nor cool.” If TMQ wants to play grammar snob, WCD will point out that temperature is actually a physical concept, representing the degree of molecular motion in matter.
WCD really doesn’t have anything to say about TMQ’s coverage of the St. Louis – Kansas City game. However, calling it the “Manly-Man Play of the Week” reminds us that we need to order The Power And The Glory: The Original Music & Voices Of NFL Films
Congrats to quarterback Eric Watt of Trine University, the 2010 Gagliardi Trophy winner. Minnesota-Duluth 20, Delta State 17. Wisconsin-Whitewater 31, Mount Union 21. This finishes the obscure college scores for the year.
Reader comments: Northwestern and Rice graduated 100% of the football players from their 2003-2004 freshmen classes, and tracking tacky Christmas lights (well, in Fairfax County, Virginia, anyway. Hmmmm. WCD wonders if there’s a market niche for a website that tracks tacky seasonal decorations globally? Sort of an “LOLLights”? Maybe we could sell it to the Cheezburger Network? Gregg, have your answering machine call my voice mail and we’ll do lunch together. Edited to add: the more we think about this, the more promise we see. But what about holidays other than Christmas and Easter? Are there tacky Eid decorations? If not, can we make a market for those? Giant inflatable Muhammad lawn decorations?)
“Single Worst Performance of the Season — So Far”: Yep, Giants – Eagles.
Finally, WCD really does not want to mock Easterbrook’s “A Cosmic Thought”: the sentiment is seemingly heartfelt, and the concept that “Life is what grants the immensity of the universe meaning.” is not one we can argue with. However, we were still much more deeply moved by XKCD, and Child’s Play raising $1.43 million dollars, and by this. (The last is by way of Popehat.)
[…] Last December, TMQ Watch responded to TMQ’s assertion that “Favre’s 297-game streak will never be broken”, offering Peyton Manning as an example, and stating …we are willing to bet TMQ $5 that Peyton Manning breaks Favre’s record. If WCD and TMQ can … […]