Whipped Cream Difficulties

Apropos of nothing in particular, a musical interlude:

There. Feel better?

After the jump, this week’s TMQ…

Ban tackle football for kids. Let them play flag football instead. 850 words down.

(It’s not 100% clear to us when Gregg Easterbrook thinks it’s okay for youth to play tackle football: past 10 years old? 12 years old? 14 years old?)

Why didn’t Kansas City call a time out?

In other football news, TMQ thinks the Steelers should trade Le’Veon Bell to the Minnesota Timberwolves for Jimmy Butler. This would solve a problem for both clubs.

We think this is Gregg Easterbrook trying to be funny, but we might actually pay money to see Le’Von Bell drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes. Anyway, TMQ’s main point is that the Bell situation is a mess, but it’s a mess that the owners brought on themselves, and Bell is just playing by “the rules”.

Stat-O-Matic. “Sweet ‘n’ Sour Game Kansas City at New England Big Plays.”

On Kansas City’s disaster snap with 51 seconds remaining, not only is a street free agent across from Rob Gronkowski…

Wait a minute. Is this the same Gregg Easterbrook who is constantly extolling the virtues of undrafted unwanted players? What difference does it make that “a street free agent” is lined up opposite Gronkowski?

Mixed defense: Baltimore good. Denver bad. Chicago-Miami.

Time for “New York Times Corrections on Fast-Forward”, TMQ’s annual item in which he thinks he’s “Regret the Error”. (Does “Regret the Error” even exist any longer? We went over to the website of the worthless Poynter Institute, and it looks like Craig Silverman’s last post there was in 2015. And the “Regret the Error” Facebook page doesn’t seem to have been updated since 2014.)

The Times long has held a double standard about greenhouse emissions: Emissions are terrible when associated with industry or political conservatism but fine when associated with liberal politicians and Hollywood celebs.

We have no opinion about the Marquis de Sade’s The 120 Days of Sodom.

Want to prevent climate change? Near-zero-emission nuclear power would be essential.

“Year of the Geezer Quarterback. (New Running Item.)” Cheese louise, Gregg, couldn’t you just bring back “Obscure College Score”?

Don’t overlook number eight, Phillip Rivers of LA/B.

Speaking of the worthless Chargers, here’s an interesting article from the Entertainment and Sports Programming Network website questioning the ongoing viability of the team.

Chicken-(salad) kicking and bad blitzing: Cincinnati. The NFL games in London stink.

Long drives: Northwestern, Virginia Tech, Austin to Albuquerque. Two of those are discussed in this week’s TMQ.

Once again, TMQ complains about the New York Jets and the New York Football Giants actually being located in New Jersey, and the San Francisco 49ers actually being located in Santa Clara. There is no horse left here to beat, Gregg: only a greasy spot on the pavement, finely atomized molecules of former horse wafting softly on the fall air, and TMQ continuing to pound that greasy pavement spot with a stick.

(Oh, by the way: the New York Football Giants have issues.)

The 500 Club. Creep.

Next Week. Clear the decks, prepare to dive—Hallmark Channel Christmas specials are about to begin.

We think this is a complete rundown of all the new Hallmark Channel Christmas specials for 2018. Unfortunately, we won’t be able to watch any of them as:

a) We don’t have cable, only broadcast TV.
II) We will be busy stabbing ourselves repeatedly in the thigh with a titanium spork.

But we will be back next week, good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 18th, 2018 at 3:17 pm and is filed under NFL, Sports, TMQ watch. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.