Whipped Cream Difficulties

Happy Thanksgiving. Yes, we’re late again. Frankly, we had trouble working up the motivation to deal with this week’s TMQ.

On the plus side, though, if we hadn’t waited, we wouldn’t have been able to link this article: please go read it now, before or after you have your turkey, it doesn’t matter which.

I don’t just remember where I was ten years ago today. I can feel it. I can close my eyes and be there again, instantly. It was my first day in Iraq. The first real day of my deployment. It was also Thanksgiving.

(Thanks to Ken “Popehat” White for the tip.)

After the jump, this week’s TMQ…

…which comes in at just a hair over 6,000 words, of which about the first 1,200 are devoted to kickoffs, and which can be summarized as: why don’t coaches do onside kicks, and why do we still have kickoffs, anyway?

In other football news, perhaps there will be a Pennsylvania Turnpike Super Bowl.

Call us when the pigs start flying, Gregg.

The Keystone State’s teams are a combined 17-3, and both just posted decisive victories in primetime.

How many of those wins were “authentic”?

Stats. Sweet: Minnesota. Sour: Kansas City. Mixed: Washington-New Orleans.

If you can make any sense at all out of “Future Curmudgeon (New Running Item)”, please leave us a note in comments. Thank you.

Dance, dance, yardage.

Whichever side wins the gays-versus-bakers dispute going before the Supreme Court, it has the best case title ever: Masterpiece Cake Shop v. Colorado Civil Rights Commission. That’s even better than Bivens v. Six Unknown Named Agents.

Come off it, Gregg. That’s not even close: just off the top of our head, we’ll mention United States v. Forty Barrels & Twenty Kegs of Coca-Cola.

To prepare for a contest in Mexico City, elevation 7,380 feet, Bill Belichick took the Patriots to Colorado Springs, elevation 6,035 feet, for a full week. Jack of the River kept his team in northern California. That’s all the information you need to know who won.

Well, you know, that’s an interesting theory. But we read somewhere post-game that Belichick didn’t want to go back to Mexico City again, citing all sorts of issues with logistics. Maybe Jack del Rio decided that his team was better off not dealing with all the issues around a game in Mexico City. He may, or may not, have been right: it just seems to us that this is more nuanced than TMQ makes it out to be.

With 2018 models arriving in showrooms, it’s time for a review of far-out features on new cars.

Or we could just read…well, we never really liked “Motor Trend”, “Road and Track” seems a bit stuffy to us, and “Car and Driver” has lost all of the writers we liked as a teenager, either due to death or old age. Are there any good car magazines left?

Something something Falcons-Seahawks.

Shania Twain will sing at the Freedom Mobil Halftime Show.

Is country music really that popular in Soviet Canuckistan? (And we wonder if there’s more demand for CFL championship tickets or Justin Trudeau apology tickets?)

“Adventures in Officiating”: out, out, bad spot. The UVA-Miami crew totally botched the call. Missed holding. And, hey, the refs got one right for Houston for once!

Buffalo still stinks. “The Football Gods Scratched Their Heads”. Could be fleas. But hey, at least they’re not chortling!

Clemson 61, The Citadel 3. “Okay, one of these schools is pretty well-known.” Actually, we think most people have at least heard of The Citadel, too. Assumption 40, California of Pennsylvania 31. Brockport 66, Plymouth State 0. Wisconsin-Oshkosh 63, Lakeland University 0. You’re welcome.

The 500 Club. “The Football Gods Chortled.” Never mind.

And that’s a wrap. Enjoy your turkey, and the Detroit game.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 22nd, 2017 at 7:50 pm and is filed under NFL, Sports, TMQ watch. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.