Whipped Cream Difficulties

You know what we miss from the new, tighter, TMQ?

We’ll tell you. After the jump, this week’s TMQ…

…lend me a tight end!

Speaking of tight ends, we miss the gratuitous cheerleader photos. (Also, 728 words down.)

Manningdämmerung. What the hell is wrong with Green Bay? And gee, Arizona looks good.

Sour: Giants, Jets. Could we have a Carolina – New England Super Bowl? What’s wrong with the Seattle secondary?

If you have an example of a great athlete whose last moment with taped ankles was bad, tweet it to me with your name and hometown @EasterbrookG.

TMQ goes off on the University of Louisville for giving Bobby Petrino a $500,000 bonus for “below-average” academic performance. We get that TMQ wants to ride the academic success hobby horse, but here’s a better question: why does Bobby Petrino have a job anywhere that doesn’t involve the phrase “You want fries with that?”

What happened to the New Orleans defense? Good offensive lines: New England, Washington. Bad offensive lines: Dallas. Creep.

The Upshot’s 4th Down Bot had to reboot its operating system after encountering “imbroglio” and “accouterments” in the same paragraph.

Timeless computer science wisdom: be conservative in what you output, and be liberal in what you accept.

Stats. Chicken-(salad) kicking: Baylor, LSU. Bad blitzing: Green Bay.

Using the timeout before the deuce — which turned out no good anyway — prevented Green Bay from reaching a manageable field-goal attempt to win.

So should Green Bay not have gone for two? Or is the problem Green Bay using the timeout? But how would Green Bay know in advance the try wouldn’t be successful? Seems like TMQ would be pitching a fit no matter what Green Bay did in this case.

Dallas is 2-0 with Tony Romo, 0-7 with anyone else under center.

Yeah, we get TMQ’s complaint about the military paying the NFL so that the NFL looks patriotic. At least, we sort of get it. But on second thought, isn’t this really just money out of the “recruitment” budget for the all-volunteer military? And do those TV commercials for the various branches of the military amount to “subsidies” for the TV networks? (We were going to make a snarky comment about the Army-sponsored NASCAR as well, but that actually ended in 2012.)

Gettysburg 21, Franklin & Marshall 7. Single worst play of the season so far: Dallas.

And another week goes by. Instead of circulating the tapes, how about kicking in to the MST3K Kickstarter?

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