Whipped Cream Difficulties

Late again, we know. Things happen. We were needed.

In this week’s TMQ…

Defense starts comebacks, offense stops them.

357 words down.

The primary reason the Patriots are dominating the Colts is that New England is the better team.

Thank you, Captain Obvious. (And another 230 words down.)

(Noted:

If way behind, focus on stopping the other side from advancing the ball. If way ahead, score again to ice the contest. Bill Belichick always keeps his foot on the gas for the latter reason.

And yet, TMQ has frequently attacked Belichick for “running up the score”.)

Monday Night Football. Personally, we were rooting for a meteor strike.

Sweet: Cincinnati.

But Dalton didn’t want the visitors to realize what he was thinking. “Badger! Badger!” was a fake audible.

Sour: Washington. Mixed: Cincinnati – Seattle (again).

…there was no game in Week 5 that paired two teams with winning records.

TMQ likes autumn. The season, not women named Autumn.

Another reason to like autumn is that the weather turns cool, and everyone looks better in sweaters.

Chicken-(salad) kicking: Tennessee.

TMQ points out that this weekend is the Indiana University of Pennsylvania – California University of Pennsylvania game. The game we’re personally looking forward to – IUP vs. Slippery Rock State – is October 24th.

The profusion of football is one of the many glories of autumn, and most football happens below the big-deal prime-time level, at human-scale facilities where tickets are reasonably priced and hanging out in the stands is a pleasant way to spend a little time on a Saturday.

Yeah, maybe. But if he starts up with that lyrical “green cathedrals” horseshit that’s screwed up baseball…

Stats. Sacks. Why isn’t there an aircraft carrier named after Bill Clinton?

Gerald Ford was a fine man but never elected to national office; Clinton was twice chosen president by voters.

Gerald Ford served honorably in the United States Navy during WWII. Bill Clinton avoided the Vietnam era draft.

What happened to Seattle’s offense? Detroit stinks. The Cowboys played it safe and lost.

At Princeton, Garrett must have cut class the day the 4th Down Bot taught a seminar.

Garrett graduated with a history degree in 1989. How long has the 4th Down Bot been around?

Hey, “Adventures in Officiating” is back! We’re delighted. This week: hitch screens.

Bad blitzing: Baltimore, Tennessee. “The Booth Gods Chortled.” So now we’ve got “booth gods”? And they’re afflicted with the chortling curse? By the way, the Texans are underwhelming, and college football is “action packed”.

The University of Maryland fired Coach Randy Edsall for the sin of failing to win enough.

Specifically, he coached for four seasons and part of a fifth, was 22-34 overall, 10-24 in conference, and the team started the season 2-4.

But with meh on-field performance and lots of empty seats, Maryland cleared a mere $6 million profit on football last year, versus $53 million in profit at Alabama and a $38 million profit at Oregon. (Use this tool to find any big college’s sports revenue and expenses.) So out the door Edsall goes.

So how much longer should they have given him, Gregg?

Presentation 51, Finlandia 21. Hurrah! The obscure college scores are back!

And with that, we wrap up this week’s TMQ Watch. Tune in next week. Will it go up on Tuesday? We’ll see.

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